Sunday, May 29, 2005
On this day:

money shot!

"give it to me baby... uh huh uh huh"
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Sunday, May 22, 2005
On this day:

I am 21% White Trash.
Not at all White Trashy!
I, my friend, have class. I am so not white trash. . I am more than likely Democrat, and my place is neat, and there is a good chance I may never drink wine from a box.

I am 100% Asshole/Bitch.
Total Asshole or Bitch!
I am one of those people that love to hear the sound of their voice. That and my lousy attitude make for a mixture as toxic next-day-mexican-dinner-ass-drip.

I am 24% Hippie.
So Not a Hippie.
What? Am I a Republican? Why did I even bother taken this test?! I guess I’ll back to my George W. Bush fan club and tell them I just wasted 10 minutes of my life. At least I don’t stink, man.

I am 0% Idiot.
Friggin Genius
I am not annoying at all. In fact most people come to me for advice. Of course they annoy the hell out of me. But what can I do? I am smarter than most people.

Sunday, May 15, 2005
On this day:

Solitude vs Loneliness

Solitude (also seclusion, isolation) means lack of contact with other people.
Short-term solitude is often valued as a time when one may work, think or rest without being disturbed.
Long-term solitude is often seen as undesirable, causing loneliness, resulting from inability to establish relationships. However, for some people solitude is not depressing. Still others (e.g. monks) regard long-term solitude as a means of spiritual enlightenment.

Loneliness is a state of feeling cut off from and longing for others, due to lack of contact (physically, emotionally, etc.) with people (whether acquaintances, friends, or loved ones). Loneliness is not to be confused with solitude (where a person may appreciate the time to think and reflect without distraction.)
Loneliness, perhaps ironically, occurs frequently in heavily-populated cities (such as New York). Loneliness can also occur in marriages, or similar physical-closeness relationships, where there has been anger/resentment or lack of "loving" communication.
Many find some "relief" from loneliness by contacting others via the Internet. However, many argue that online relationships are no substitute for "in-person" relationships, and that a person's true identity cannot be determined on the internet.
It is said that loneliness is the only disease that can be cured by adding two or more cases together.

magna civitas magna solitudo;
"never less alone than when alone" [Rogers]

A Glitch in the Matrix

The term déjà vu (French: "already seen", also called promnesia) describes the experience of feeling that one has witnessed or experienced a new situation previously.

The experience of déjà vu is usually accompanied by a compelling sense of familiarity, and also a sense of "eerieness" or "strangeness". The "previous" experience is most frequently attributed to a dream, although in some cases there is a firm sense that the experience "genuinely happened" in the past.

Déjà vu has been subjected in recent years to serious psychological and neurophysiological research. The most likely candidate for explanation, according to scientists in these fields, is that déjà vu is not an act of "precognition" or "prophecy" but is actually an anomaly of memory; it is the impression that an experience is "being recalled" which is false. This is substantiated to an extent by the fact that in most cases the sense of "recollection" at the time is strong, but any circumstances of the "previous" experience (when, where and how the earlier experience occurred) are quite uncertain. Likewise, as time passes, subjects can exhibit a strong recollection of having the "unsettling" experience of déjà vu itself, but little to no recollection of the specifics of the event(s) or circumstances they were "remembering" when they had the déjà vu experience, and in particular, this may result from a overlap between the neurological systems responsible for short-term memory (events which are perceived as being in the present) and those responsible for long-term memory (events which are perceived as being in the past).

A clinical correlation has been found between the experience of déjà vu and disorders such as schizophrenia and anxiety, and the likelihood of the experience increases considerably with subjects having these conditions. However, the strongest pathological association of déjà vu is with temporal lobe epilepsy. This correlation has led some researchers to speculate that the experience of déjà vu is possibly a neurological anomaly related to improper electrical discharge in the brain. As most people suffer a mild (ie. non-pathological) epileptic episode regularly (eg. the sudden "jolt", a hypnagogic jerk, that frequently occurs just prior to falling asleep), it is conjectured that a similar (mild) neurological aberration occurs in the experience of déjà vu, resulting in an erroneous "memory".

Déjà vu is popularly associated with precognition, clairvoyance or extra-sensory perceptions, and it is frequently cited as evidence for "psychic" abilities in the general population. Non-scientific explanations attribute the experience to a "prophecy" or "vision" (most commonly delivered via a dream), or alternatively to an experience had in a past life related to a reincarnation.

Other psychological phenomena have been labelled

* jamais vu (never seen, where the familiar is experienced as if never seen before) and
* presque vu (almost seen).
* Déjà vécu is the sense of already having lived through an experience.
* Also, déjà eprouvé, "already experienced".


Differences between VA disability and Social Security Disability
Disabled veterans will usually find themselves dealing with the social security administration, at some point or another. And this is only to be expected. However, many vets may end up very surprised when they learn how different the two systems really are. In this article, we’ll discuss the principle aspects of the SSA system as well as a couple of differences that exist between the two systems.
To begin with, how does social security disability work? Basically, like this: a person who feels that he or she is disabled contacts the social security office that is closest to them. They inquire into how a disability application can be filed and an appointment is set, either for an in-office interview, or an over-the-phone interview. This is for the purpose of filing what is called an initial claim.
Once the paperwork for the initial claim is complete, the claimant’s file is transferred to a state agency known as DDS, which stands for disability determination services. At DDS, the claimant’s file is assigned to a Disability Examiner, a specialist who will gather the claimant’s medical records and, then, in consultation with a physician and/or a psychologist who is assigned to the examiner’s unit, make an approval decision or denial decision. Unfortunately, the decision that is made is typically a denial. In fact, denials occur roughly seventy percent of the time at the initial claim level.
After the initial claim is denied, the claimant may file a new claim (a mistake) or may follow the appeal process and file what is known as a request for reconsideration.
The reconsideration works exactly as the initial claim. The paperwork is filed at the social security office which, once more, sends the claimant’s file off to disability determination services. When the reconsideration (or recon, for short) is received at DDS, it is assigned to a reconsideration-level examiner…who does exactly what the initial examiner did. He or she gathers whatever medical evidence is thought to be needed and then makes a decision. Typically, this is also a denial. And, in fact, recons are denied at an even higher rate: about eighty-five percent of the time.
After a recon denial, a claimant may elect to follow the appeal process again and file a request for hearing before an administrative law judge.
Fortunately, this is where most claimants will have the best chance of winning their claims. Unfortunately, because the system is so backed up, it may take an extremely long time to have a hearing date set. Depending on which part of the country the claimant resides in, and how backlogged their local hearing office is, it may take a year or longer to have a hearing date set.
In a nutshell, this is how the disability process plays out for most individuals (this is an abbreviated version, of course). Now, how is the federal social security disability system different from the the VA system?
Primarily, the SSA system is different from the VA system in that there are no percentages of disability. While the system that exists for vets allows the veterans administration to conclude that a vet is 40% disabled and then receive benefits based on that determination (and potentially have that percentage upgraded over time to a full 100% rating), in the social security system it is all or nothing.
With the social security disability system, a claimant is either awarded 100% of their eligible benefits, or zilch. Without a doubt, the SSA system is fairly draconian. In fact, the definition of disability used by the social security system stipulates that not only must your condition have kept you out of work…(from the website) “Your disability must also last or be expected to last for at least one year or to result in death.”
The percentage approach is the greatest single difference between the ssa and va disability systems. However, there are other aspects regarding social security disability that veterans should probably know about.
First of all, if your primary source of treatment is a VA medical center, don’t assume that the DDS examiner who is assigned to your case will be successful in obtaining your VA medical records. The VA is notorious in some areas for not supplying needed medical records. And for this reason, it’s never a bad idea for vets to personally obtain their medical records themselves so they may turn these records in when they apply for disability, or file an appeal. One word of caution, though: never submit anything to social security without making a copy first since the social security administration is fairly notorious itself for loosing things that have been sent to them.
Veterans should also know that, unlike the VA system, you’re entitled to attorney representation from the very start. Yes, you are allowed to have an attorney with you if you appeal a VA claim denial, but since the VA only allows an attorney to be compensated $10.00 for this first appeal, most vets will find it difficult to get assistance from an attorney. In the social security system, an attorney works off a contingency-fee basis from the moment they represent a claimant. In other words, if they win the case, they get paid 25% of whatever backpay that SSA decides it owes the claimant. The corollary of this, of course, is that the attorney receives nothing if the case is not won.
Is an attorney always needed in a social security disability case? No. And, in fact, there are many outstanding disability representatives who are not attorneys at all and are referred to as “non attorney representatives” (many of these non attorney reps are former social security employees who put their experience to use representing disabled individuals).
The rule of thumb for getting an attorney (or non-attorney) is usually this. If you get denied on your initial claim, you might as well get an attorney. Because in most cases, the first appeal (the recon) will be denied and a claimant will have to request the second appeal:, a hearing before an administrative law judge. And, of course, to go before a judge without representation is never a good idea.
The SSA disability system can be exasperating and difficult. Most individuals who’ve gone through the system have, at some point, concluded that the system is rigged against them. And, to be honest, it would be difficult to argue completely against that conclusion.
However, the best advice any claimant can utilize with regard to filing for disability is simply to learn as much as possible about the system and use that information to avoid simple mistakes, and even costly ones.

Disabled American Veterans (DAV)
Depertment of Veterans Affais
Social Security
Veterans Benifits and Services
Veterans News and Information Services


And so does the cost of the War in Iraq!

Cost of the War in Iraq


Saturday, May 14, 2005
On this day:

Killer Caffeine?

I guess with like most everything, Moderation is the word of the day whan it comes to Caffine.


From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.
Then–in my childhood, in the dawn
Of a most stormy life–was drawn
From every depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain,
From the sun that round me rolled
In its autumn tint of gold,
From the lightning in the sky
As it passed me flying by,
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.


by Edgar Allan Poe

Thats IT!

I've decided to become a Hermit. People suck, I don't have the energy, desire, or social skills needed to maintain a large social network. I don't have to. Not EVERYONE is cut out to be happy go lucky social butterflys. I know I am not. I am going to create my own world, my own life, and my own rules for living. If you people don't like it then fuck off. I didn't invite any of you people anyway. This is MY LIFE, I am not going to spend it chasing the dreams and life style that "society" tells me I should. If that is wrong, if my misanthropy bothers you, then so be it.


A hermit (from the Greek erēmos, signifying "desert", "uninhabited", hence "desert-dweller") is a person who lives to some greater or lesser degree in seclusion from society.
Hermits in religion
From a religious point of view, the solitary life is a form of asceticism, wherein the hermit renounces wordly concerns and pleasures in order to come closer to the deity or deities they worship or revere. This practice appears in Christianity, Hinduism, Islam, and Buddhism. In ascetic hermitism, the hermit seeks solitude for meditation, contemplation, and prayer without the distractions of contact with human society, sex, or the need to maintain socially acceptable standards of cleanliness or dress. The ascetic discipline can also include a simplified diet and/or manual labor as a means of support; for example, the early Christian Desert Fathers often wove baskets to exchange for bread.
Ironically, religious hermits are often sought out for spiritual advice and counsel and may eventually acquire so many disciples that they have no solitude at all. Examples include Anthony the Great, who attracted such a large body of followers in the Egyptian desert that he is considered by both Catholics and the Orthodox to be the "Founder of Monasticism", and Gautama Buddha, who, having abandoned his family for a solitary quest for spiritual enlightenment, ended up as the founder of Buddhism.
One interesting variation of the eremitic life is the Carthusian order of Roman Catholic monks and nuns. Carthusians live in what are essentially "communities of hermits", each monastic having their own cell (with sleeping chamber, study, and workshop) where they spend most of their time alone, except when they meet in church for worship, and on other occasions.
Other religious hermits include Simeon Stylites, Herman of Alaska, Thomas Merton, Sergius of Radonezh, Seraphim of Sarov, and Charles de Foucauld.

Non-religious hermits
It is also possible for people to forsake human society for reasons other than religious. For example, Henry David Thoreau spent two years living an essentially solitary life near Walden Pond in pursuit of a simple, environmentally-friendly life. In a more notorious case, Theodore Kaczynski, known as the "Unabomber", lived in a remote cabin in Montana which gave him both refuge from what he viewed as a society corrupted by technology and privacy to build mailbombs.

Hermits in philosophy
Friedrich Nietzsche, in his influential work Thus Spoke Zarathustra, created the character of the hermit Zarathustra (named after the Zoroastrian prophet Zarathushtra), who emerges from seclusion to extol his philosophy to the rest of humanity.
Diogenes the Cynic, an ancient Greek philosopher, led an ascetic life in a barrel. According to legend, when Alexander the Great came to him one day and offered to grant him a wish, Diogenes asked Alexander to step out of his sunlight.

Seclusion. Exclusion. Reclusion.

Reclusiveness is the tendency to avoid social interaction with, and often the mere presence of, people. Reclusiveness can be deliberate, such as the behavior exhibited by hermits, or it can be due to apathy, a phobia, or other anxiety disorders.

Or all of the above.

"among them but not of them" [Byron]

Are you a Loner?

our score = 70

Some people would call you independent, others might say you're anti-social. You don't go out of your way to be with people, and actually prefer your own company to that of others!

Friday, May 13, 2005
On this day:


Pain of mind on account of something done or experienced in the past, with a wish that it had been different; a looking back with dissatisfaction or with longing; grief; sorrow; especially, a mourning on account of the loss of some joy, advantage, or satisfaction.
Dislike; aversion.
To experience regret on account of; to lose or miss with a sense of regret; to feel sorrow or dissatisfaction on account of (the happening or the loss of something); as, to regret an error; to regret lost opportunities or friends.

"Regret is an odd emotion because it comes only upon reflection. Regret lacks immediacy, and so its power seldom influences events when it could do some good."
William O'Rourke

"Don't wish it were easier, wish you were better."
Jim Rohn

Tuesday, May 10, 2005
On this day:

Ford Exploder

Tuesday, May 03, 2005
On this day:

Dragon Tao

Monday, May 02, 2005
On this day:

GMMG ZL1 Camaro SS

The Phase III 427 Engines are built by GMMG Inc. and offered only as part of the ZL1 SuperCar package. These engines are not available to the general public.
Engine Description
Cylinder Case GM Motorsports C5R Race Case
Crank Shaft (Callies) Forged 4340 steel crank with 4.0” stroke
Connecting Rods (Callies) 6.125” Billet 4340 steel rods with ARP fasteners
Pistons 4.125” bore lightweight (JE) pistons, designed for this specific application, ultra precision machining with certification and matching pins
Ring Pack File fit specific metric (JE) rings
Camshaft Hydraulic Roller designed specifically for GMMG Phase III application
Cylinder Heads GMMG Phase III CNC ported LS-6 heads with full radius valve seats
Valves 2.055” intake and 1.600” exhaust with undercut swirl polished stems
Timing Chain High strength roller timing chain
Pushrods One piece 4130 steel (Comp) pushrods
Valve Retainers Titanium retainers
Valve Springs Tapered springs with 320 lbs open pressure specifically designed for LS6 cylinder heads
Head Gasket Composite big bore (Cometic) head gasket
Harmonic Damper Special (ATI) Crank Damper
Chassis Upgrade Description
Intake Special “Wilson Manifolds” Modified Holley Aluminum Intake
With ZL1 Number Engraved on Top
Exhaust Special Phase 3 Only 1 7/8” Headers, 3” Y-pipe, with 4”
Collector, and Rear Electric Cutout with Dash Switch

Wretched Excess

"700 hp at 5200 rpm and 740 pound-feet at 4600 rpm. That's more than the 493-hp Mercedes S600, the 550-hp Saleen S7, and the 650-hp Ferrari Enzo Ferrari."

Vehicle type: front-engine, 4-wheel-drive, 5-passenger, 5-door truck
Price as tested: $126,620 (base price*: $124,500)
Engine type: twin-turbocharged and intercooled pushrod 16-valve V-8, aluminum block and heads, GM/LPE engine-control system with port fuel injection

Displacement: 428 cu in, 7008cc
Power (SAE net): 700 bhp @ 5200 rpm
Torque (SAE net): 740 lb-ft @ 4600 rpm
Transmission: 4-speed automatic with lockup torque converter
Wheelbase: 130.0 in
Length: 221.4 in
Curb weight: 5709 lb
Zero to 60 mph 4.0 sec
Zero to 100 mph: 11.1 sec
Zero to 130 mph: 21.2 sec
Street start, 5-60 mph: 4.5 sec
Standing 1/4-mile: 12.7 sec @ 106 mph
Braking, 70-0 mph: 182 ft
Roadholding, 300-ft-dia skidpad: 0.83 g
EPA fuel economy, city driving: 11 mpg
*Base price includes all performance-enhancing options.